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Just Tell Them!
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10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH

1. Do not express damaging or derogatory information about someone that might cause him physical, psychological or financial harm, even if it is true and deserved.
2. Promote people’s well being. When in doubt, don’t speak out.
3. Humor is great, but make sure jokes aren’t at someone else’s expense.

4. Be kind to yourself. Speaking badly even about yourself is unethical.
5. Don’t listen to gossip. If you can’t change the direction of the conversation, it is advisable to leave.
6. If you inadvertently hear damaging information, you should believe that it is NOT true.
7. Always give others the benefit of the doubt and focus on the positive.
8. Words once spoken can’t be erased. Think before you speak, especially if you are angry, hurt or jealous.
9. Use kind and supportive words with your children and spouse whenever possible. Harsh words can cause irreparable harm as can speaking derogatorily to others about the ones you love most.
10. It is not only permitted, but required, to warn a person about potential harm – for example, that a potential business partner has a repeated record of embezzlement.

Halachot Lashon Horah
The Chofetz Chaim
הלכות שמירת הלשון Click to View/Close
  • Affliction of the Soul
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • Loshon Hora: A Definition
  • Breach of Halachah
  • Lack of Commitment
  • Relative Statements
  • Character
  • Content and Intent
  • Matters of Taste
  • Past History
  • Self Incrimination
  • With Permission
  • Common Knowledge
  • Ambiguous Statements
  • Obvious Intent
  • “Your Peopleâ€?
  • Other Forms of Negativity
  • The Listener
  • Repentance
  • Definition
  • Embarassing Remarks
  • Ruining Opportunities
  • Disparagement and Ridicule
  • When the Subject Approves
  • About Children
  • Harming the Wicked
  • Repentance
  • Unknowing Victim
  • Other Means of Communication
  • Without Names
  • Slander
  • Non-Kosher Entertainment
  • Negative Allusions
  • Harmful Praise
  • Praisein the Presence of Adversaries
  • Obvious Implications
  • Constructive Negatives
  • Public Knowledge But Harmful
  • Baalei Teshuvah
  • The Habitual Speaker of Loshon Hora
  • Like Any Other Prohibition
  • Fighting Fire With Fire
  • Toeles – Constructive Purpose
  • Parameters
  • Preconditions
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • A Last Resort
  • Be Accurate
  • Intent
  • Harmful Information
  • In Summation
  • Helping Others to Improve
  • Passing Judgment
  • The Occasional Sinner
  • The Habitual Sinner
  • Social Pressure
  • Public Announcements
  • Loshon Hora and the Non-Observant
  • Avoiding Flattery
  • Character Deficiencies
  • Problem Students
  • With No Alternative
  • Harming A Student
  • Informing
  • Initiating A Din Torah
  • Accusations Against the Beis Din
  • The Rights Of The Victim
  • Verbal Abuse
  • Serious Threats
  • Possible Harm
  • Overhearing a Threat
  • Consumer Protection
  • A Better Deal
  • Unsafe Products
  • Kashrus
  • Shifting the Blame
  • Quest for Truth or Personal Feud
  • Rabble-Rousers
  • Teaching from Other People’s Mistakes
  • Breaking up a Harmful Friendship
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting a Relationsip
  • When Facts May be Concealed
  • Suggesting a Shidduch: The Balance
  • Advice
  • The Struggle Against Lashon Ha’ra
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting A Relationship
  • When suggesting a sidduch
  • When Facts May Be Concealed
  • When Listening is Lowly
  • 10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH
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Login
"NO GOSSIP PLEASE"
Don’t Be Shy!!!
Just Tell Them!
“NG PLEASE”
NG Please!!

Click to view

10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH

1. Do not express damaging or derogatory information about someone that might cause him physical, psychological or financial harm, even if it is true and deserved.
2. Promote people’s well being. When in doubt, don’t speak out.
3. Humor is great, but make sure jokes aren’t at someone else’s expense.

4. Be kind to yourself. Speaking badly even about yourself is unethical.
5. Don’t listen to gossip. If you can’t change the direction of the conversation, it is advisable to leave.
6. If you inadvertently hear damaging information, you should believe that it is NOT true.
7. Always give others the benefit of the doubt and focus on the positive.
8. Words once spoken can’t be erased. Think before you speak, especially if you are angry, hurt or jealous.
9. Use kind and supportive words with your children and spouse whenever possible. Harsh words can cause irreparable harm as can speaking derogatorily to others about the ones you love most.
10. It is not only permitted, but required, to warn a person about potential harm – for example, that a potential business partner has a repeated record of embezzlement.

Halachot Lashon Horah
The Chofetz Chaim
הלכות שמירת הלשון Click to view
  • Affliction of the Soul
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • Loshon Hora: A Definition
  • Breach of Halachah
  • Lack of Commitment
  • Relative Statements
  • Character
  • Content and Intent
  • Matters of Taste
  • Past History
  • Self Incrimination
  • With Permission
  • Common Knowledge
  • Ambiguous Statements
  • Obvious Intent
  • “Your Peopleâ€?
  • Other Forms of Negativity
  • The Listener
  • Repentance
  • Definition
  • Embarassing Remarks
  • Ruining Opportunities
  • Disparagement and Ridicule
  • When the Subject Approves
  • About Children
  • Harming the Wicked
  • Repentance
  • Unknowing Victim
  • Other Means of Communication
  • Without Names
  • Slander
  • Non-Kosher Entertainment
  • Negative Allusions
  • Harmful Praise
  • Praisein the Presence of Adversaries
  • Obvious Implications
  • Constructive Negatives
  • Public Knowledge But Harmful
  • Baalei Teshuvah
  • The Habitual Speaker of Loshon Hora
  • Like Any Other Prohibition
  • Fighting Fire With Fire
  • Toeles – Constructive Purpose
  • Parameters
  • Preconditions
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • A Last Resort
  • Be Accurate
  • Intent
  • Harmful Information
  • In Summation
  • Helping Others to Improve
  • Passing Judgment
  • The Occasional Sinner
  • The Habitual Sinner
  • Social Pressure
  • Public Announcements
  • Loshon Hora and the Non-Observant
  • Avoiding Flattery
  • Character Deficiencies
  • Problem Students
  • With No Alternative
  • Harming A Student
  • Informing
  • Initiating A Din Torah
  • Accusations Against the Beis Din
  • The Rights Of The Victim
  • Verbal Abuse
  • Serious Threats
  • Possible Harm
  • Overhearing a Threat
  • Consumer Protection
  • A Better Deal
  • Unsafe Products
  • Kashrus
  • Shifting the Blame
  • Quest for Truth or Personal Feud
  • Rabble-Rousers
  • Teaching from Other People’s Mistakes
  • Breaking up a Harmful Friendship
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting a Relationsip
  • When Facts May be Concealed
  • Suggesting a Shidduch: The Balance
  • Advice
  • The Struggle Against Lashon Ha’ra
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting A Relationship
  • When suggesting a sidduch
  • When Facts May Be Concealed
  • When Listening is Lowly
  • 10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH

Vayishlach

FMT – SHABBAT VAYISHLACH By Rabbi Jonathan Horowitz

November 19, 2021 Sammy Tamir
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Then he took from his possessions, a gift to his brother Esau. (Genesis 32:14) On his way homeward, Jacob learns…

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Posted in: Weekly Parsha, Rabbi Jonathan Horowitz, FMT Five Minute Torah, Bereshit, Parsha, Vayishlach Filed under: Parashat Vayishlach, Vayishlach, FMT Vayishlach

Parashas Vayishlach – Your Choice!

Sammy Tamir
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The Parasha informs us, that prior to meeting Eisav “Yaakov became frightened and distressed. He therefore divided his people, as…

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Posted in: Rabbi Shimon Fridmann, Weekly Parsha, Bereshit, Parsha, Vayishlach Filed under: Parashat Vayishlach

FMT – Parashas Vayishlach 5781 – Not to be Judgemental

December 3, 2020 Sammy Tamir
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The Verses recount: “That very night he arose, and took his two wives, his two maidservants, and his eleven children,…

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Posted in: Rabbi Shimon Fridmann, FMT Five Minute Torah, Bereshit, Parsha, Vayishlach Filed under: FMT Vayishlach

Parashas Vayishlach 5781 – Living Miracles!

December 1, 2020 Sammy Tamir
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The Parasha informs us, that prior to meeting Eisav “Yaakov became frightened, and it distressed him. So, he divided the…

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Posted in: Rabbi Shimon Fridmann, Parsha, Vayishlach Filed under: Vayelech

Parashas Vayislach 5780 – The pitfall of Deception

December 11, 2019 Sammy Tamir
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Yaakov, after his dream, made a vow (Bereshis 28,20-22). if Hashem would be with him and would protect him, he,…

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Posted in: Rabbi Shimon Fridmann, Bereshit, Vayishlach Filed under: Vayishlach

Vayishlach 5777 – Take the plunge

December 16, 2016 Sammy Tamir
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In this week’s Parsha, Dinah the daughter of Yaakov was snatched by Shechem and violated. Her brothers, Shimon and Levi…

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Posted in: Parsha, Vayishlach Filed under: Parsha

Torah Teaser – Parashat Vayishlach Questions & Answers – December 16 2116-5777

December 15, 2016 Sammy Tamir
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Why Didn’t Eisav Marry Le’ah? Upon Yaakov’s return to Eretz Yisrael, when his encounter with Eisav became inevitable, Yaakov sent…

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Posted in: Vayishlach, Torah Teasers Filed under: Torah Teasers

Vayishlach 5776 – Think About Your Life

November 26, 2015 Sammy Tamir
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And Hashem said to Yaakov, ‘arise, go up to Bais Keil and dwell there and make an altar to Hashem…

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Posted in: Parsha, Vayishlach Filed under: Parsha

Torah Teaser – Parashat Vaiyshlach Questions & Answers – November 26 2115-5776

Sammy Tamir
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Why Didn’t Eisav Marry Leah? Upon Yaakov’s return to Eretz Yisrael, when his encounter with Eisav became inevitable, Yaakov sent…

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Posted in: Vayishlach, Torah Teasers Filed under: Torah Teasers

Vayishlach 5775 – Effort and Results

December 4, 2014 Sammy Tamir
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Ad he slept on that night (Bereshis 32:14) And he slept that night in the camp (Bereshis 32:22) Yaakov seems…

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Posted in: Parsha, Vayishlach Filed under: Parsha

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