1. Do not express damaging or derogatory information about someone that might cause him physical, psychological or financial harm, even if it is true and deserved.
2. Promote people’s well being. When in doubt, don’t speak out.
3. Humor is great, but make sure jokes aren’t at someone else’s expense.
4. Be kind to yourself. Speaking badly even about yourself is unethical.
5. Don’t listen to gossip. If you can’t change the direction of the conversation, it is advisable to leave.
6. If you inadvertently hear damaging information, you should believe that it is NOT true.
7. Always give others the benefit of the doubt and focus on the positive.
8. Words once spoken can’t be erased. Think before you speak, especially if you are angry, hurt or jealous.
9. Use kind and supportive words with your children and spouse whenever possible. Harsh words can cause irreparable harm as can speaking derogatorily to others about the ones you love most.
10. It is not only permitted, but required, to warn a person about potential harm – for example, that a potential business partner has a repeated record of embezzlement.
1. Do not express damaging or derogatory information about someone that might cause him physical, psychological or financial harm, even if it is true and deserved.
2. Promote people’s well being. When in doubt, don’t speak out.
3. Humor is great, but make sure jokes aren’t at someone else’s expense.
4. Be kind to yourself. Speaking badly even about yourself is unethical.
5. Don’t listen to gossip. If you can’t change the direction of the conversation, it is advisable to leave.
6. If you inadvertently hear damaging information, you should believe that it is NOT true.
7. Always give others the benefit of the doubt and focus on the positive.
8. Words once spoken can’t be erased. Think before you speak, especially if you are angry, hurt or jealous.
9. Use kind and supportive words with your children and spouse whenever possible. Harsh words can cause irreparable harm as can speaking derogatorily to others about the ones you love most.
10. It is not only permitted, but required, to warn a person about potential harm – for example, that a potential business partner has a repeated record of embezzlement.
The Gemara in Megillah states that it is forbidden to gaze at the face of an evil person. Chaza”l learn this out from the fact that Yitzchok lost his sight at the end of his life. The cause, according to Chaza”l, was Yitzchok’s gazing at Eisav’s face. Eisav’s great impurity caused Yitzchok to lose his vision.
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Rabbi Aharon Dovid Singer
Rosh Kollel, NMB Kollel
Director, South Florida Torah Initiative
הלכות שמירת הלשון