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Just Tell Them!
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10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH

1. Do not express damaging or derogatory information about someone that might cause him physical, psychological or financial harm, even if it is true and deserved.
2. Promote people’s well being. When in doubt, don’t speak out.
3. Humor is great, but make sure jokes aren’t at someone else’s expense.

4. Be kind to yourself. Speaking badly even about yourself is unethical.
5. Don’t listen to gossip. If you can’t change the direction of the conversation, it is advisable to leave.
6. If you inadvertently hear damaging information, you should believe that it is NOT true.
7. Always give others the benefit of the doubt and focus on the positive.
8. Words once spoken can’t be erased. Think before you speak, especially if you are angry, hurt or jealous.
9. Use kind and supportive words with your children and spouse whenever possible. Harsh words can cause irreparable harm as can speaking derogatorily to others about the ones you love most.
10. It is not only permitted, but required, to warn a person about potential harm – for example, that a potential business partner has a repeated record of embezzlement.

Halachot Lashon Horah
The Chofetz Chaim
הלכות שמירת הלשון Click to View/Close
  • Affliction of the Soul
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • Loshon Hora: A Definition
  • Breach of Halachah
  • Lack of Commitment
  • Relative Statements
  • Character
  • Content and Intent
  • Matters of Taste
  • Past History
  • Self Incrimination
  • With Permission
  • Common Knowledge
  • Ambiguous Statements
  • Obvious Intent
  • “Your Peopleâ€?
  • Other Forms of Negativity
  • The Listener
  • Repentance
  • Definition
  • Embarassing Remarks
  • Ruining Opportunities
  • Disparagement and Ridicule
  • When the Subject Approves
  • About Children
  • Harming the Wicked
  • Repentance
  • Unknowing Victim
  • Other Means of Communication
  • Without Names
  • Slander
  • Non-Kosher Entertainment
  • Negative Allusions
  • Harmful Praise
  • Praisein the Presence of Adversaries
  • Obvious Implications
  • Constructive Negatives
  • Public Knowledge But Harmful
  • Baalei Teshuvah
  • The Habitual Speaker of Loshon Hora
  • Like Any Other Prohibition
  • Fighting Fire With Fire
  • Toeles – Constructive Purpose
  • Parameters
  • Preconditions
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • A Last Resort
  • Be Accurate
  • Intent
  • Harmful Information
  • In Summation
  • Helping Others to Improve
  • Passing Judgment
  • The Occasional Sinner
  • The Habitual Sinner
  • Social Pressure
  • Public Announcements
  • Loshon Hora and the Non-Observant
  • Avoiding Flattery
  • Character Deficiencies
  • Problem Students
  • With No Alternative
  • Harming A Student
  • Informing
  • Initiating A Din Torah
  • Accusations Against the Beis Din
  • The Rights Of The Victim
  • Verbal Abuse
  • Serious Threats
  • Possible Harm
  • Overhearing a Threat
  • Consumer Protection
  • A Better Deal
  • Unsafe Products
  • Kashrus
  • Shifting the Blame
  • Quest for Truth or Personal Feud
  • Rabble-Rousers
  • Teaching from Other People’s Mistakes
  • Breaking up a Harmful Friendship
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting a Relationsip
  • When Facts May be Concealed
  • Suggesting a Shidduch: The Balance
  • Advice
  • The Struggle Against Lashon Ha’ra
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting A Relationship
  • When suggesting a sidduch
  • When Facts May Be Concealed
  • When Listening is Lowly
  • 10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH
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    • Free Mazuza & More
    • Guarding our speech for 2 hours view post
    • Refuah List
    • Parnasa List
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    • Mazel & Bracha for Success
    • Teshuva List
    • Shidduch List
    • Easy Childbirth
    • Success to Conceive
    • Missing Person List
    • Igunot List
    • Parole List
    • Post A Note at The Kotel
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        • Toledot
        • Vayetze
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        • Vayeshev
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        • Ki Teitzi
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        • Nitzavim
        • Vayelech
        • Haazinu
        • V’Zot HaBerachah
    • Halacha
      • Halacha on the Parsha
      • Halachapedia
      • Mi Yodeya
    • My613
    • Lashon Hara
    • Holidays
    • Fast Days
    • Davening
      • Go Daven
      • Smart Siddur
      • Online Ashkenaz Siddur
      • Online Sefard Siddur
      • Online Edot HaMizrach Siddur
    • Kitzur Daf
      • Chulin
      • Horayot
      • Menachos
      • Zevachim
    • Pirkei Avos
    • Torah Teasers
    • Memories
    • Torah Anytime
      • Aish HaTorah
      • Chabad.org
      • Sefaria
      • The Shmuz
      • Jewish Virtual Library
  • Ion Kosher
  • Famous Quotes
  • Jokes
  • Subscribe
    • Subscribe to our weekly newsletter & Divrei Torah
  • Find Jewish Singles
  • Ask The Rabbi A Question!
  • My Miracle
  • Sell Your Stuff Free Listing
  • Post A Note at The Kotel
  • Need A Recipe? Ask The Chef?
Login
"NO GOSSIP PLEASE"
Don’t Be Shy!!!
Just Tell Them!
“NG PLEASE”
NG Please!!

Click to view

10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH

1. Do not express damaging or derogatory information about someone that might cause him physical, psychological or financial harm, even if it is true and deserved.
2. Promote people’s well being. When in doubt, don’t speak out.
3. Humor is great, but make sure jokes aren’t at someone else’s expense.

4. Be kind to yourself. Speaking badly even about yourself is unethical.
5. Don’t listen to gossip. If you can’t change the direction of the conversation, it is advisable to leave.
6. If you inadvertently hear damaging information, you should believe that it is NOT true.
7. Always give others the benefit of the doubt and focus on the positive.
8. Words once spoken can’t be erased. Think before you speak, especially if you are angry, hurt or jealous.
9. Use kind and supportive words with your children and spouse whenever possible. Harsh words can cause irreparable harm as can speaking derogatorily to others about the ones you love most.
10. It is not only permitted, but required, to warn a person about potential harm – for example, that a potential business partner has a repeated record of embezzlement.

Halachot Lashon Horah
The Chofetz Chaim
הלכות שמירת הלשון Click to view
  • Affliction of the Soul
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • Loshon Hora: A Definition
  • Breach of Halachah
  • Lack of Commitment
  • Relative Statements
  • Character
  • Content and Intent
  • Matters of Taste
  • Past History
  • Self Incrimination
  • With Permission
  • Common Knowledge
  • Ambiguous Statements
  • Obvious Intent
  • “Your Peopleâ€?
  • Other Forms of Negativity
  • The Listener
  • Repentance
  • Definition
  • Embarassing Remarks
  • Ruining Opportunities
  • Disparagement and Ridicule
  • When the Subject Approves
  • About Children
  • Harming the Wicked
  • Repentance
  • Unknowing Victim
  • Other Means of Communication
  • Without Names
  • Slander
  • Non-Kosher Entertainment
  • Negative Allusions
  • Harmful Praise
  • Praisein the Presence of Adversaries
  • Obvious Implications
  • Constructive Negatives
  • Public Knowledge But Harmful
  • Baalei Teshuvah
  • The Habitual Speaker of Loshon Hora
  • Like Any Other Prohibition
  • Fighting Fire With Fire
  • Toeles – Constructive Purpose
  • Parameters
  • Preconditions
  • End Result
  • Reprove First
  • A Last Resort
  • Be Accurate
  • Intent
  • Harmful Information
  • In Summation
  • Helping Others to Improve
  • Passing Judgment
  • The Occasional Sinner
  • The Habitual Sinner
  • Social Pressure
  • Public Announcements
  • Loshon Hora and the Non-Observant
  • Avoiding Flattery
  • Character Deficiencies
  • Problem Students
  • With No Alternative
  • Harming A Student
  • Informing
  • Initiating A Din Torah
  • Accusations Against the Beis Din
  • The Rights Of The Victim
  • Verbal Abuse
  • Serious Threats
  • Possible Harm
  • Overhearing a Threat
  • Consumer Protection
  • A Better Deal
  • Unsafe Products
  • Kashrus
  • Shifting the Blame
  • Quest for Truth or Personal Feud
  • Rabble-Rousers
  • Teaching from Other People’s Mistakes
  • Breaking up a Harmful Friendship
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting a Relationsip
  • When Facts May be Concealed
  • Suggesting a Shidduch: The Balance
  • Advice
  • The Struggle Against Lashon Ha’ra
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Potentially Harmful Relationships
  • Suggesting A Relationship
  • When suggesting a sidduch
  • When Facts May Be Concealed
  • When Listening is Lowly
  • 10 PRACTICAL GUIDELINES FOR POSITIVE SPEECH

Matot

Parashat Matos 5781 – Humility Saves!

July 6, 2021 Sammy Tamir

  In Parashas Pinchas Moshe was ordered: “Assail the Midianites and defeat them, for they assailed you by the trickery…

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Posted in: Matot, Parsha, Rabbi Shimon Fridmann, Weekly Parsha Filed under: Matot

Parashas Matos 5780 – Serving Hashem with Joy

July 16, 2020 Sammy Tamir

The Gemara Baba Kama 38a recounts Moshe saying, “And the Hashem said to me, do not be at enmity with…

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Posted in: Bamidbar, Matot, Rabbi Shimon Fridmann, Uncategorized Filed under: bamidbar, Matot

Parashas Matos – 5779 – Intelligence is more powerful that might

July 30, 2019 Sammy Tamir

The Gemara Baba Kama 38a recounts Moshe saying, “And the Lord said to me, do not be at enmity with…

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Posted in: Bamidbar, Bamidbar, Matot

Torah Teaser – Parshat Matos/Masei Questions & Answers – July 13 2118-5778

July 15, 2018 Sammy Tamir

The Torah Ends With A Lesson For The Ages The Torah is considered to be complete after Sefer Bamidbar. Sefer…

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Posted in: Masei, Matot, Torah Teasers Filed under: Torah Teasers

Matos/Masei 5775 – The Uphill Journey

July 16, 2015 Sammy Tamir

These are the journeys (Bamidbar 33:1) It is summertime. It is a time for travel. It is a time for…

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Posted in: Masei, Matot, Parsha Filed under: Parsha

Matos 5774 – Priorities

July 17, 2014 Sammy Tamir

They approached him and said, “Pens for the flocks shall we build here for our livestock and cities for our…

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Posted in: Matot, Parsha Filed under: Parsha

Matos/Masei 5773 – Don’t Embarrass Others

July 3, 2013 Sammy Tamir

The descendants of Gad and the descendants of Ruvain came… they said, “if it pleases you, let this land be…

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Posted in: Masei, Matot, Parsha Filed under: Parsha

Matos-Masei 5772 – Don’t make others judge you favorably

July 18, 2012 Sammy Tamir

You will be clean before Hashem and before Yisrael (Bamidbar 32:22) I saw an amazing thought this week written by…

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Posted in: Masei, Matot, Parsha Filed under: Parsha

Mattos 5771 – Prepare for what you say

July 21, 2011 Sammy Tamir

If a man makes a vow to Hashem or an oath to prohibit something to himself, he may not profane…

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Posted in: Matot, Parsha Filed under: Parsha

Matos/Masei 5770 – Live to eat or eat to live

July 7, 2010 Sammy Tamir

“Anything placed on a fire, you must pass it through fire to purify it, but it also must be purified…

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Posted in: Masei, Matot, Parsha Filed under: Parsha

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